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Vaca Time

Vaca Time

 

Oh the wonderful anticipation of a well-deserved vacation.  We count down the weeks, the days and the hours until that incredible moment of departure.  Then we get a whoop, whoop and off we go to a fun-filled, amazing adventure.

Now I gotta tell you that I had all intentions of being a good girl, but then something happened.  I discovered that I really couldn’t see how just one drink could hurt.  I deserved it after all, especially considering how hard I work right?

Well, isn’t it amazing how we can talk ourselves into or out of about anything we put our minds to?   But that is exactly what I did…..just one drink….or two…..or three…or…..   Uggh!  Did I really just do that?  Yep, that was me alright.  The perfect role model of the perfect Christian was on display-not!  Oops, it’s a good thing my friends and family can laugh and move on.

Considering this was day one of our seven-day trip, I figured I better get myself in check before I did something real stupid.  But the real question is why did I get myself to that place in the first place?  Did I really think that sucking down mass quantities of those perfectly blended frozen drinks with the cute little umbrellas was the answer to wipe away all the stress and anxiety from which I was escaping?  Well, at that moment in time—Yes!

But then that yes turns into a resounding why?  Was knowing that God had provided this perfect cruise aboard a luxury liner not enough?  Was the fact that I am so very blessed to even be going on vacation not enough?  Was the fact that I was surrounded with 40 of my closest friends and family not enough?  Was knowing that the Holy Spirit was there with me not enough?  Or assuring myself that Jesus died so that I could have and enjoy my life not enough?  Well, I was enjoying myself—right?

So, I spent the next six days doing my best to be a good girl.  The kind of girl that God would be proud of.  But I still felt this pushing fault within myself.  It was a guilt that I just couldn’t shake and a behavioral response to no pressure that I just couldn’t understand.  Then as I spent another private moment alone with God, I found myself apologizing for my past behavior and almost begging him to forgive me….again.

I kept thinking to myself, why do I keep sinning and letting myself down with wrong thoughts, actions and behaviors.  Then I remembered that Hebrews 10 explains that we have been made perfect, yet we are being made holy.  Through his death and resurrection, Christ, once for all made us perfect in God’s sight.  And at the same time we are being cleansed and set apart for his special use for us.

So you see, we don’t have to be surprised, ashamed or shocked that we still need to grow.  God isn’t finished with me yet, and he isn’t finished with you either.  Yes, I should have listened to the Holy Spirit’s leading and stayed away from my alcohol demise, and yes I should have given Christ control of my desires, but I do not have to keep beating myself up.  Christ took it all for me!   He took each and every one of mine and your sins and replaced them with his perfection.

Now I walk with my head held high, filled with a life I adore.  Thank you Lord for the precious life blood that cleanses me from all unrighteousness.  Thank you for allowing me to enter God’s presence with boldness knowing that I have personal access to God through Christ.  And thank you Lord that I may grow in faith, overcome all my doubts and questions, and deepen my relationship with my God and Father.

So, hold your head high and never, ever be ashamed of your past, present and future sins.  You are loved regardless of your behaviors.  Learn to listen to that inner voice, trust in Christ and know that you are loved always.

 

Blessings:  Heather Joyner

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